Being a step parent is a mental shift that many people can’t accept, which is why rates of divorce are so high in blended families – and I totally get it. Blended families are hard work and they require a lot of effort. Children from separated parents don’t owe the step parents anything but often as the step parent you are left feeling unappreciated and like an outsider in your own home.

Those frustrating comments from people like “you signed up for this” are so ignorant. You sign up for the children because you love your partner. What person in their right mind would choose to take on a full set of children when you often don’t get anything in return and often feel taken for granted.

Remember, it’s not natural to love children who aren’t yours, it’s something that develops over time. You do it because you believe in the cause. Investing in your step children is something you do long term, in the hopes that they grow up with positive memories from childhood, become good people and they feel like their feelings are valid. Because at the end of the day it’s not their fault their parents separated.

Lydi x